2014 was Hell, but a Blessing

To those that have been following my blog or social media posts, you have seen that my 2014 was a living nightmare both on a personal and professional level. It was a year I lost my little brother, closed down an office I built, and shut down my first product. It was a hellish storm that I had to choose to navigate through or drown in.

As I look back on 2014 and wonder why things happen like it did, I learned that this year has been a blessing and here are the lessons I wanted to share with you:

1. Personally, I found family again.

Being away from home for the past 7+ years, I was focused on work, all I did was work so that I can move up fast. Visiting family occurred once a year (for a max of 1 week) and doing nothing but taking advantage of the fact that my family will “always” be there, it was a cycle on autopilot.

To those that are in the same work mindset as me, I have one thing to say: “Work will always be there, family time is a fading asset.” I can promise that through the worst parts of your life, your family and their support will rejuvenate and heal your soul better than anything you can buy. Take the time to hang out with your family and friends and don't let holidays be the excuse to do it.

2. Professionally, I moved forward.

When you have an idea, it’s your baby and you do not want to give it up. You want to keep going, hoping something big would happen. Sadly, it happens 50% of the time. When I created MeSocial, my gut told me at the beginning of this year to give up on the website product and to move on with a mobile app idea. 6-months and tens of thousands dollars later, I have learned this lesson. To my fellow entrepreneurs, listen to your gut, follow the market trends, and most importantly, learn to let go. It will save you the time and money. And this app? Well, stay tuned for our New Year announcement!

3. Overall, I removed negative, stressful people.

If you have never experienced a loss of a loved one, it is hard to process when others around you go through it. When I told someone that my best friend passed away, he gave me a blank stare and did not say one word. “I’m sorry,” “Keeping you and your family in my prayers,” and “I’m hurting with you” are simple words that have a meaningful impact to those who are grieving. I now have been on both sides and all I can tell you is do not sit in silence. Your real friends (the expected and even the unexpected) will be there for you, keep them and forget the others. At the end of the day, you need people that can stand by you.

In my entire career, I have only fired 3 individuals and they all share 3 common traits: constantly making excuses, ability to not progress, and behaved selfishly. To those that manage a team and to my fellow entrepreneurs, always listen to your gut about people and remove those individuals sooner rather than later. The amount of stress that is removed, surpasses any guilt for letting a “nice” person go. It is your team/company, protect it and drop the dead weight so that you can move forward.


As I look forward to 2015, I am better equipped to take on the next challenges and I have to thank 2014 for it. It was never ideal but what situation ever is? I can never wish for 2014 not to happen, how else would I ever learn about these perspectives? Yes, it sucked. Yes, I grew from it.

I hope my lessons learned help you navigate your storm. Here is to a better New Year!

Saying Goodbye to Our First Product, MeSocial

First Version - Concept

Started out as an idea to manage all social media, MeSocial was the launching point of our company, 1ME, LLC. Creating an unknown path for us to take on, teaching us more than we ever realized, and weeding out individuals who could not grasp the entrepreneur profession, MeSocial was more than just a product we were trying to create, it was a learning tool for a start-up venture.

Since its beta launch in April 2013, it has spawned a team size of 12, raised $10K from a crowdfunding campaign, created an office in India with 5 developers, and a user base north of 600 accounts.  Today, that is no more.



With its main intentions to integrate posts from the major social networks into one location, ability to manage multiple accounts, and allow you to make a status update that could be posted across all your connected social accounts at one time, it was just the base of what MeSocial could do. As we further its development, we were able to integrate chat from Facebook and Google Hangouts, add a news RSS reader, pull in videos/pictures trends, manage calendars locally and from Google, and the ability to create sticky notes, to just name a few features.

Second Version - Alpha Testing

The question I faced earlier this year was do I grind and continue this website or do I pivot to something else? With the changing technology landscape and the rapid shift to mobile and mobile apps, it was time for MeSocial to pivot to the mobile platform as well. Something I should have done last year, to be honest with you and base on the "when will you have a mobile app?" questions from our users alone. That was an expensive lesson and MeSocial will never be the product that I saw in my vision a couple years ago. That is a good thing as my vision has changed and developed to something I know is better.

Third Version - Beta Launch

Now all of this is gone but what it left behind is a wealth of lessons learned, self development, and the mechanics of how to operate a start-up. So farewell to 1ME's first product, MeSocial. You have shown us what it is like to take an idea to reality, pushed us to our limits as we tried to keep up with the ever changing technology landscape, and taught us the hardships of being an entrepreneur.

We are done with MeSocial, the website. However, a piece of its function will exist as we build a mobile app that is just more than a social hub and I'm excited to share that news soon!

Last Version

Lastly, I would like to personally say thank you to all of our friends, family members, and MeSocial users that have signed up on this website, who took the time to share your feedback, and most importantly, believed in the team and I in this start-up venture!

Failures are great only if you choose to learn from it. So stay tuned!

The 4 P's of a Professional

Most of you have heard of the 4 P’s of Marketing, tools for you to use to take your product or service to market. They are guidelines, a framework to build off from and to use to produce results. So over the past couple of months, I have been contemplating about going back to Corporate America after quitting it to take on the startup route. As my company has changed (which you can see in my blog) and funds begin to dry up, I needed to continue to live even if it meant ending my startup path and starting a corporate job again.


As I looked over my resume, I began thinking about that corporate life and the choices, risks, and stress that I consumed. What I thought was a “normal” career path was just a different route that I forged myself (LinkedIn profile or see background below). While continuing to think about my company’s future, I began to analyze what type of people I wanted to bring on. Here are the set of tools, the framework, I think a motivated, driven professional should have in business. For those who are curious, here is my take, the 4 P's of a Professional:

Passion. Are you looking forward to Monday? While it was a faux pas, I left my first job out of college after 3-months because I simply did not enjoy what I did. As simple as it sounds, you cannot let the “comfort zone” outweigh the enjoyment with what you are doing now, tomorrow, and 5 years from now. Yes, there are days where you hate it, but that should not be every day. If you have the passion for what you do, the work shows it as you are willing to give your best in everything you do and to put your stamp of approval on all of your deliverables. With it, putting in the extra hours, skipping on some social gatherings, and taking little vacation becomes a “want to do” rather than a “have to do.” Passion creates drive and motivation for you to go into the unknown (like taking on new roles and projects not within your skill set) and turning lessons learned into growth opportunities. If you regret Mondays, then maybe that job is not what you really want?

Pain. Are you suffering in a good way? No pain, no gain is a fundamental lesson in the sports world that can be applied to a business world as well. There were some points during my career, where I did not enjoy a project or did not get along with a manager or team member. From being thrown into a basement (literally, I was sitting next to the water heater) of a client’s office doing audit work (not my skill set) to overstepping my role and taking responsibilities from my manager to better deliver to the client, I gained skills that built my career arsenal that I have used time after time. This is after I have told myself these skills would never be used again. Excuses have been the easy way out and the go to answer to problems or deliverables. They showcase your inability to produce and the effort you are willing to put into it. If  something needs to be done, pull out the stops and turn excuses into solutions. Hearing the “it is below my pay grade” phrase makes me cringe because it meant I would need to do more work to look for a different solution. Imagine the things you will learn (gain) just through the process of looking (pain) for a solution, often more than once.

Persistence. Are people coming to you? Following up is a simple task but many people fail to do it. What I have noticed at meetings or discussions in passing, people (including myself) are tasked with action items and “promises” to deliver it soon. However, these action items tend to not be delivered soon or have been forgotten. It’s no one's fault, everyone gets busy and items are prioritized. However, when action items hinder your delivery and you are waiting, you have to follow-up with those individuals. Yes, sometimes it sounds like nagging but you’ll be surprise how many “thanks for the reminder, here you go” that I have received. If you want/need something from someone, you have to take the initiative and follow-up with them, consistently, until you get it. That's why there are deadlines and why you should put a date against everything. This persistence gets you the answer you are looking for to deliver your work in a timely manner. Consistent execution and hard work will always show, so go get it, follow-up, and manage everyone's expectations. Most importantly, if you promised something to someone, get it done.

Progress. Are you growing your role? You could go get your MBA, get certifications, and/or additional training, which is all part of your professional development. However, that is not the type of progress I am talking about in this context. One time during a company re-org, I was placed into a team that I could not grow in. So I pushed myself out by working with another manager to establish a new team, taking responsibilities from others because we were able to deliver better. When you first start a job, you are given a set of roles and responsibilities that is required of you. On some occasions, you help others and go above the “call of duty” in your current role. That is great, however, progress is taking your role and responsibilities and expanding them and sometimes, taking them from other teams/individuals to ensure that the work is delivered to client/c-level execs/senior management in a timely fashion. You must have the confidence that you can do it and once you are able to deliver it better, they come to expect that from you, making it your “new” responsibilities.

Most likely, you answered yes to the 4 questions but that is just surface. When you dig deeper and understand what each tool entails to execute, does that yes stay a yes? If so, you are on your way to showcase that you are not just a professional, but an ambitious one. There are 2 types of driven professionals, those that focus on work (lack of personal life) so that they can move up the corporate ladder as fast while there are others (work/life balance) that focus on their delivering their day-to-day tasks exceedingly well. I’m sharing my views, based on my experience, with those professionals that are always hungry, the ones that believe that you cannot have a work/life balance. However, there is a price to pay. Giving up a social life and friends/family time, having a 60-80+ hours work week, and working on weekends, to name a few. Making decisions that are professional based and not personal based is what it comes down to at the end of the day.  Take a step back and look at where you are at now and those people you envy, notice what they are doing? These Ps are simple tools but it is about executing them and what I see in the framework of a driven, ambitious professional.

Appreciate any feedback that you may have on this post. Stay tuned as I put together "The 4 P's of an Entrepreneur” next.

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Career Background Snapshot:

After 3-months at a large consulting firm, I quit my first job out of college. I moved to a boutique consulting firm where I took on some project manager roles, working with clients directly, managing 1-2 individuals, and creating and giving presentations to senior managers. Through that, I was promoted in only 2 years instead of the normal 3-years’ timeline. After the 4th year of my career, while doing project management work for a client, I took an offer for a position with them. Continuing with what I was doing for them as a consultant, I helped create a new team within the Office of the COO after refusing to join another team during their organization re-structure. During that time, I pushed for and received a promotion a year ahead of their normal “HR suggested” timeline. After 3 years, I decided to leave and focus on my startup. In short, the first 7 years of my career, I was promoted 2 times, more than doubled my salary in only 4 years, presented to and worked with senior managers/c-level execs for most of it, and only took about 3-months worth of vacation. All on top of volunteering for a professional business organization, managing and overseeing 30+ volunteers and 20 universities. Was it worth it?

Thank You Letter to the 1ME India Team

I wanted to share my email to the 1ME India team, truly grateful to work with these people!

To my first 1ME Team,

WOW. I cannot believe it has already been a year here in India and 2 years working together on this start-up. Originally, it was just for MeSocial but you have helped me build 1ME and develop MeToo Studios. I have been told that we moved at a fast pace and I can truly say, yes we did! You should be proud at the work you have accomplished in an environment that was quite hectic.

Long days, sleepless nights, and working non-stop every day for weeks at a time, I have pushed you guys to the limits. The best part is that these limits were pushed further and further and it shows me what you are capable of doing and then some. Was it worth it? You decide but I would definitely say yes! It has been great watching you all learn, grow, and develop as I have done the same. The team I knew years ago, just requested for requirements and then coded. The team I know now, questions, advises, and provides feedback on how to make the product better. You have gone from being a "developer" to an "engineer" where you now put thought and creativity into what you do. What an awesome thing to witness and I hope you see it as well.

Even though we are not able to continue together, I hope you remember the goals you have set for yourself on the back of the 1ME sign. I ask that you continue to meet with each other, share ideas, and develop together. We share this common bond which I will always cherish because it is a start to something great! Remember 2 things. First, success is not about being the best, it is about seeing what the person next to you is doing and doing it better. Second, there is always a solution to a problem.

On behalf of the 1ME team, directors, and investors, thank you for all you have done for my company. I am blessed to call you my colleague, friend, and family member. I look forward to the next steps and what the future holds for you all. Do not hesitate to contact me if you have questions or need someone to bounce ideas off from, I am here for you. It is not a goodbye but till we meet again. Many more successes awaits!

Sincerely,
Thomas

Saying Goodbye In More Ways Than One

Well this it, 1ME’s last day in India. This amazing learning experience and chapter comes to a closing as I start on a new path and say goodbye to the team. I have re-written this post many times because I am not quite sure how to express my more personal thoughts. So here it goes.

Looking back at my first (First Day of a New Chapter) and recent posts (A Year Later and I Failed, The Top 5 Reasons Why), I am displaced by the emotions, questions, and confusion, both professionally and personally. I hit a rough patch for 1ME but made the needed decisions to remove the unnecessary stress points. On the personal side, I have experienced many life changes this past year, such as selling my condo, moving to a different country, quitting a paying job, watching my mom get re-married, giving a eulogy for my best friend, Jonathan, of 15+ years, and recently becoming an Uncle. My professional and personal life has merged into one as much as I have tried not to let each aspect affect the other. As a result, I have been in state of blah (to simply put it) dealing with a tremendous amount of stress and dark emotions which have been soften by happy moments. Every day has been a challenge and every night has been another sleepless encounter.

As I wrap up my time and close the office here in India, I have been trying to face the reality that this is the first time I will be home since I left for Penn State. I am not ready to come home because I am not ready to face this reality. I head out with Christian today, stopping in Delhi to check out the Taj Mahal and other sites for a couple days. From there, we part ways as he heads home and I buy a one way ticket to somewhere. After working literally every day for the company since I decided to do it full-time, I’m mentally exhausted. After leaving home 13 years ago and have no choice but to return, I’m at a lost.

Those that know me, know that I rather work than play, giving up hanging out with friends and attending events. Even at social events, I am always talking about the next opportunity and sharing new ideas. Rarely, I share my personal life because there was nothing to share. It was one in same, my work life. This has changed recently as the two life aspects take on a life of its own with its complications and then merging together and creating a chaotic mess in my head.

First, I need to find a better direction with my company. I need to stop the financial bleeding or go back to the corporate world, which means all the risks I have taken would be for nothing. I need to find that answer.

In parallel, I need to find peace with myself that Jonathan will not be there when I come home. We have spent almost every day together for 2 years leading to my departure to Penn State and almost every day together when I would come home to visit. He was the one person that I saw first when I got home. He was the one person that allowed me to forget about the stress that was life. He was the one person that made home a place for me to exist in. Now that is gone. His birthday is around the corner and it would be the first time in 13 years that I would be home for it. I honestly cannot remember the last time I even celebrated it, how is sad is that? So why start now? I have lost that chance forever.

Grief is a multifaceted response to loss and the goal is to reorganize one’s life, so the loss is an important part of life rather than its center. I need to take some time to grieve and find peace in my heart (personally) and in my mind (professionally). I can best describe it in words from one my favorite songs, "I wanna feel the car crash, 'Cause I'm dyin' on the inside, I wanna let go and know that I'll be alright." There is an answer out there, I just need to find it. I want to smile again, where a smile is not hiding grief, disappointment, and stress.

Thank you for your support this past year, I will never forget those that stood by me, supported me, and have turned their backs to me. We will talk soon when I start the next chapter of this startup venture, but for now, I'm saying goodbye.

A Year Later and I Failed, The Top 5 Reasons Why

May, 2013: Quit my job.

June: Sold my place, moved from NYC to India, and opened our first office.

July: Hired several more developers.

August: Moved into a townhouse, converted the downstairs into an office for 10 people.

October: Launched MeTooStudios, a web design and service division.

November: Co-founded 1More, a non-profit corporation.


Skip forward to March: I’ve told my team here in India that I will not be renewing their contracts. I’ve reduced our U.S. team by half. I sold MeToo Studios, and stepped down from the board of 1More. I am closing the 1ME office in India and returning back home at the end of this month.

That was my first year, in a nutshell. I have taken my company in full circle, starting out with one core product, MeSocial, and ending the year with our focus back on it. Failure was always inevitable, but learning from my mistakes and adapting is the difference between quitting and succeeding. As the company founder, I am driven by the huge risk/reward factor of my business, and I expected that others, who had risked little or less, to hold the same mindset. That is the basis of my overall failure. As I look back on this past year, I failed to achieve what I envisioned, and here are the top 5 reasons why:

1. I believed in good intentions. Good intentions are great, but when the thoughts do not align with actions and dedication, then those intentions become false hopes. I failed because I hid the fact that some team members lacked the level of experience needed, as well as the motivation to progress, learn and adapt in a startup environment. Yes, the expectation level was high, but the willingness to adapt (or not), makes or break the individual in a startup atmosphere. Individuals, by nature, do mean well, but that has little value in a startup if they lack the motivation (risk factor) to pursue changing circumstances and demands.

2. I was too nice. “Nice guys finish last” is a phrase that indicates that you cannot get what you want by being kind or considerate. Honestly, who wants to finish last anyway? There are many levels of nice, but being too nice can lead to being a push over. From my ignorance of India's culture, to avoiding confrontation, being too flexible caused me to lose respect and slowed down my overall progress. I failed to put the company first and I lost time and money because I did not make the needed changes sooner.

3. I fed on hype. A startup is a hot word and in today’s world, we see more of them and more people leaving their jobs to start one. This trend leads to hype for those individuals who are given an opportunity to be a part of one. From my perspective, the hype lasted only for a short period of time because the focus was building a future that I risked everything for. I brought on people who loved the idea, but who did not understand the risk and time that was necessary. I failed because I too got caught up in the hype, the new ideas I encountered, and new team members joining my effort. I lost sight of the future and our core mission, instead focusing on the day-to-day.

4. I was afraid to cut my losses. The first three reasons resulted in my getting to this point. Sometimes ideas and people do not just work out. My goal of wanting to teach and develop people, and to watch them become successful, hindered my resolve to take the necessary actions. I needed to let some people go and make changes on how the company operated. I failed because I was hesitant to confront those issues head-on and start over.

5. I didn’t look for a mentor. With a “do it myself” attitude, I launched into this venture with no guidance. My knowledge of the startup world was largely limited to what I saw in the news or read online. Combining my research with my professional experience, I was confident I would be able to do this on my own, and refused to actively seek mentorship or more formal startup incubators or VCs. It took me longer to realize that I was stretching myself thin, holding onto dead weight, and not aligning with the company’s original focus. Even though I had a team, most of them were younger professionally, which made it hard to bounce strategic ideas off from. I became a mentor and spent more time training then moving forward. I failed to become a mentee, but fortunately that is no longer the case now.

This past year, I have learned a lot and pushed the boundaries that I thought was impossible, further and further. I have been very patient, I have wasted time and resources, and I have negotiated with my level of expectation. I have been in a cloudy dream of having a company which did not match the reality.

I often questioned why I am even doing this at all. How much more can I bleed financially before it becomes an impossible hole to climb out from? When does ambition become a burden? Do I go back to the corporate world when I gave up everything to get out of it? Truthfully, I do not know. This venture has been a struggling blessing for me.

So what now? The company is slimmer and the focus is honed, now is the time to charge forward. Honestly, I failed and I'm glad that I did. Let yesterday's limits become today's starting point, right?

My One-Step Corporate World Exit Strategy

Make your idea/dream/start-up venture your

#1 Priority.

Yes, that is it, everything else will follow suit. If you truly want to do your own thing, you have to make it the most important thing in your life, both personally and professionally. Every decision needs to be focused on how you can sustain yourself so that you can work on your start-up. Yes, there are risks, but your financial situation is not an excuse to go for what you want in life. Start saving, cut back on expenses, and invest in the future. Be able to distinguish your needs from your wants. Ideally, save enough so that you can sustain yourself for 6 months to 1 year, but even a couple of months can provide the opportunity to seize your dreams. Even though you might not be getting a regular paycheck, you are developing yourself professionally.

IF you reach to a critical point where you NEED a regular paycheck, you can add this amazing experience to your resume and make yourself even more marketable. I can promise you that you will learn more, experience more, and do more than you have ever imagined. The skills you will learn are commendable in your professional development and can translate back into the corporate world, should you decide to go back. I do not recommend it.

To share a piece from a post from Jason Goldeberg, Founder and CEO of FAB (thanks Josh G. for the share!):

"It’s really hard. It’s intense. It’s a struggle. It’s ambiguous. It changes a lot. It’s all consuming. It’s a lot of sausage making. It’s working weekends to hit numbers and dates. It’s stretching people beyond their comfort zone. It’s insisting on doing it better even when it’s already pretty good. It’s being brutally honest about gaps and weaknesses. It’s one day you’re headed in one direction and the next day another, because the first move wasn’t the best move. It’s being ok with things not working because that creates opportunities to learn how to fix it.

It’s a fucking startup."

It is time to turn that dream into a reality. You have one life, make the most from it.